Quite Disturbing
by kamikazitsunami
Summary: This is really a crossover between different anime, we just put it in Gundam Wing because it kinda starts with Trowa...please read if you need a laugh and want to read about a 20 inch syringe go through Roy Mustang's shoulder! Has character death.Sort of.
1. Chapter 1: The Beginning

**Chapter 1 **

One pleasant dark and stormy evening, Lily was playing on her laptop (which was continuously beeping). After it started to screech, she picked it up and threw it at Trowa. It shattered on his hard head. It made one last, pathetic beep and then exploded into a thousand pieces. May its soul burn forever in the eternal and fiery pits of censored.

Trowa burped loudly; then blinked. Oh joy. Rachel then walked into the room followed by a cute-looking Chrono. Then suddenly, Roy Mustang came in the room sporting a pink floral mini-skirt. People stared at him. A lot. Roy then did a 360 spin which made the mini-skirt spin up. Lily took pictures. Rachel blinked.

Yuki walked in to see Roy in mid-spin. Yuki was wearing a bright pink dress that was knee-length. Lily then suddenly noticed that Trowa was wearing a low-cut, strapless, purple sundress. Rachel shut her eyes and winced while Lily stared while thinking 'He still looks hot. Amazing.'

Chrono was also sporting a more conservative red sundress. Rachel stared for a while then walked out of the room. Smart, ne? Lily asked why they were all wearing girl clothing, and Yuki answered, "It is national cross-dress day". Lily replied, "You're not from this nation." Yuki paused, puzzled.

Lily randomly grabbed Trowa and French-kissed him. Trowa returned the favor. Roy felt left out and Yuki looked for Rachel. Rachel came back into the room A/N: Not so smart, ne? and hugged Yuki. Chrono starts to cry, so Roy hugs him A/N: Ain't that sweet? Then, Pegasus strolled into the room displaying a pale pink corset and long skirt decorated with his favorite cartoon rabbit. People stared. A lot. Again. He then asked, "Has anyone seen my Millennium Eye?"

Everyone twitched.

Lily then asked, "Why do you have a corset" she continued, "come to think of it, why do any of you have dresses and skirts?" The Royster then said, "That knowledge is on a need-to-know basis, and you don't need to know it". A/N: Huh? There was an odd silence following this statement.

After listening to some of Rachel's music, Lily then stated "Saxophones are so sexy". Rachel flinched and turned the music up louder when "The Reason" came on. Lily and Trowa then stood up and shouted "I know this song!" Rachel, Lily, and Trowa started to sing along to the music. Rachel had technical difficulties with the slidey- wooden thing that holds the key board. Lily then said, "Throw it across the room, it always works for me!" Trowa ducked just in case. Rachel A/N: unfortunately took Lily's advice and threw it across the room. It managed to ricochet off the wall and hit Trowa on the back of the head. He blanked out and fell over.

Lily then felt the sudden urge to do something _naughty_…so she randomly picked up a wrench, a hammer, and some other things. She walked outside, to where Trowa's Gundam was parked, pausing to give Trowa a look that said "Follow and you will die."

Rachel shrugged and hugged Chrono this time. A/N: Yuki is now a rat, due to the hugging Chrono felt loved. Roy and Pegasus were depressed. Roy because he didn't feel loved, Pegasus because he couldn't find his eye.


	2. Chapter 2: The Syringe

Chapter 2

Then, in a cloud of evil smoke, emerged the morbid form of Rachel's doctor! A/N: shrieks like little school girl Rachel paled 10 shades and squeezed Chrono so close he turned purple. She grabbed Roy and used him as a shield. "Set her on fire! Set her on fire!" screamed I, scared beyond all belief. The evil doctor-lady then swooped several feet toward us and then said, "Time for your shot!" Rachel paled a couple more shades and winced.

The doctor of many evils came closer and closer, paralyzing Roy with a glance. A/N: Pegasus is sitting in the corner of the room, in his corset, sipping grape juice The demented doctor pulled out a syringe 20 inches long. Rachel was white by now. Chrono was mauve.

Before the ebil doctor could inject Rachel with the lethal looking Hepatitis B vaccination, Rachel kicked Roy in front of her. Roy fell unconscious as the needle pierced his delicate skin. The doctor jabbed the needle through Roy's shoulder, into Rachel's upper left arm. Luckily, the needle only went in 1 inch deep. Unluckily for Roy, he got 19 inches of the needle. Rachel let go of Chrono and removed the needle from Roy and herself. She then hurled it at the evil doctor, who received 20 inches of needle straight through the neck. She disintegrated, screaming curses at everyone in the room.

* * *

Well, there ya go! Roy got 19 inches of syringe in his shoulder! Poor Roy, I feel a bit guilty though...

My thanks to you:

Maruchan LE

haku wife


	3. Chapter 3: The Gundam Dragon

Chapter 3

During this entire ordeal, Trowa was pacing around the room, worrying about his poor Gundam. Pegasus was POed, so he left. Lily suddenly came in as Pegasus was leaving and flicked him off as he passed her. Trowa immediately ran up to Lily and demanded to know what she did to his Gundam. Her eye twitched and then she leaned forward and bit him. A/N: Oh, so kind Rachel sneezed. Lily then beckoned them all outside to show them what she had done to the innocent Gundam.

"NOOOOOOO!" Trowa shouted, "WHERE'S MY MACHINE GUN!" (A/N: Obviously, that's all he cares about) Lily had somehow transformed the Gundam into a dragon-like robot thang. "WHAT HAPPENED TO MY beloved MACHINE GUN!" Trowa yelled. Lily replied just as loudly, "IT STILL THERE YOU DUMB-!" Trowa then screamed, "WHERE? I DON'T SEE IT!" Lily climbed into the former Gundam and pressed a button. The dragon's mouth opened, and an enormous machine gun popped out. Trowa, impressed, said "Wowwwww…" Lily smirked and said, "And that's not all…" Lily pulls a switch this time and the dragon scales pull up revealing a machine gun under EVERY one.

Trowa : awed silence

Rachel walked back inside. She strolled into the hallway and into her room. When she came out, she had several articles of blingage around her neck. A/N: and on her fingers, wh00t, wh00t! Lily blinked as she walked into the kitchen and said, "Yo, home skillet, whaddup?" to Yuki. All of the people migrated into the indoors, except Trowa who was now trying out his new "Gundam Dragon". Suddenly, all of the people indoors started talking like a gangstah. A/N: they are all still wearing dresses 'cept fo' Lily-fooz and Rachel

Lily returned to the outside world to prevent Trowa from completely destroying cute little creatures that were innocently munching on grass and whatnot. Trowa followed Lily reluctantly into the indoors. What they then saw shocked and amazed them. Standing there viciously where Rachel and company should have been was a giant, colossal dragon. This was not just any dragon though; it was the legendary Pungo Dragon of Pizza.


	4. Chapter 4: The Gundam and Pizza Dragon

**Chapter 4**

**.+ The Gundam and the Pizza Dragon +.**

Lily and Trowa's first thought was 'Coool.' (A/N: Actually Trowa was thinking how many machine guns he'd need to shoot that sucker down) But then, the great dragon glared right at them and picked Trowa up in it's claws. Lily laughed at the stupidity of it all; then went outside to get Trowa's Dragon Gundam. The first thing she did was use the Dragon Gundam to try out some new break dancing moves. Then with one mighty sweep of the Gundam/Dragon's sword-like claws she knocked the house down so she could actually fight the great Pungo Dragon of Pizza.

The fierce pizza-eating dragon (of doooom) dropped the Trowa and fought the Lily. Lily cut its stomach open and guess who was there…

Yuki, Roy, and Chrno! But no Rachel in sight! Everyone looked around the jagged carcass of the dragon, but couldn't find Rachel. Then, suddenly, Rachel came walking in the wreckage of the house with Sesshomaru clasping one of her hands, and ice cream in the other. She licked the ice cream and then said, "Hey, wuzzup?", then "Did I miss something?" Sesshomaru looked around. "WHAT HAPPENED TO THE HOUSE!" Rachel screamed. Sesshomaru covered his pointy ears. "Ummm, I had nothing to do with that…" Lily said pointing at Pegasus who then joined them with a new glass eye. It was pink and had sparkly-ness in it.

Rachel jumped on Pegasus and started fighting with him. He didn't have his Millennium eye any more, so he was powerless. Sesshomaru stared at them for a while before proceeding to cut off Pegasus's head. Rachel hugged Sesshy, and Sesshy felt loved. Lily then noticed that Trowa was nowhere to be seen. She looked for him. She walked over to the dragon and then saw a pointy lock of brown hair sticking out from under the dragon's colossal behind. She used the Dragon Gundam to pry the Legendary Pungo Dragon of Pizza's cold corpse off of Trowa's limp body.

Lily jumped out of the cockpit and noticed that Trowa's left leg was bent at an impossible angle. 'The dragon's huge butt must have crushed his leg' Lily pondered. Lily poked Trowa (A/N: thankfully not on the leg) and he woke up with a large groan. "You're pathetic!" Lily announced, everyone watching and feeling sorry for poor Trowa. Trowa then said, "Oh, you're so kind."

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Author's Notes: 

We had much fun making this chapter...you better like it. Or else... Lily will be forced to eat you.


	5. Chapter 5: Hair Styling

**Chapter 5**

**.+ Hair Styling +.**

Then all of the anime guys had bad hair days and had to have Rachel and Lily repair their hair. Lily sat Trowa down in a chair and got a gallon of hair gel. She dumped it on his head and some of it dripped down his face. Good thing he was once again unconscious because of his broken limb(s). She brought out one of Rachel's countless combs/ brushes. At first, she made his hair worse because she felt like it, then got bored and fixed it. Rachel, on the other side of the room, was being evil. She put Roy's hair into pigtails to match hers.

Roy, unknown to Rachel, was dead. The 19 inches of rusty needle had finally taken affect. Rachel poked Roy and told him he can leave. He didn't move. Rachel kicked him out of the seat and told Sesshomaru to sit down. He obeyed. Rachel pulled out a comb and began to fix Sesshomaru's hair. She then dumped a bucket of gravy over his head and brushed it. She pulled out her infamous blow dryer of dooom! (A/N: from beyond the grave) Lily likes this so-called blow dryer because the purdy after-affects. After blow-drying the Sesshy's hair, which was gravy-colored, she curled it with a curling iron.

Sesshy patted his new hair-do (n't) and Lily shouted, "I'll do Chrno's hair!" Chrno was already afraid, but now he was terrified. Lily picked up a bucket from somewhere, then walked over to Trowa and pulled a grenade out of his pocket. She walked back to Chrno, pulled the thing that makes it go boom, quickly stuffed it in the bucket, put the bucket over Chrno's head and… _**BOOM!** _

Chrno was not very happy the rest of that day.

* * *

Author's Notes: 

Yes, we admit it, we actually saw the whole granade-in-bucket thing from a Gundam Wing Omake from the manga...this is the disclaimer-like thing I suppose...please don't sue us...


	6. Chapter 6: Playing Surgeon

**Chapter 6**

**.+ Playing Surgeon +.**

After the whole grenade-in-bucket incident, the group of peoples went to see a movie. The movie they decided to see was "The Ring: Two". During the movie, Lily-fuzz held on to Trowa, whose leg was still shattered into many pieces. Rachel grabbed Sesshomaru, Chrono, and Yuki (at the same time?). They actually were not scared; they just needed an excuse to hold the boy-peoples.

After the movies, the party went back to the house. Lily finally decided to do something about Trowa's leg. Lily decided to play surgeon instead of paying lots of money to get a professional to fix Trowa's poor leg. She tied him to a chair (very tightly) and told the other people to hold him down if need be. She pulled out her many instruments of torture.

She inspected her instruments to make sure they were all there and in working order. "Let's see; duct tape, a board, X-ray machine thingie, a wrench, Hydrogen Peroxide, and… I lost the pain killer, too bad." Lily smiled. Everyone but Rachel backed away, receiving a glare from Lily. Trowa sweats, and tries not to completely freak out.

First, Lily uses the X-Ray machine to find out which bones were broken. Suddenly it started to beep uncontrollably. "Not again!" shouted Lily. She picked it up and began slamming it on a table. It exploded in a million pieces, and bits of metal shrapnel flew everywhere. Many of them of the pieces flew into various people. Rachel and Lily both grabbed Chrno and used him as a shield so that they wouldn't get shrapnified. A few pieces of shrapnel flew into Trowa's already broken leg. Trowa winced.

Lily then got made and said, "Great, now I have to find tweezers!" Rachel twitched. She ran off and got them. While waiting for lily, Rachel was reminded of the whole syringe-in-Roy's-shoulder event. She felt a little guilty about using him as a shield to protect her own skin. She walked over to Fluffy, who was protected by his fluff. She asked him to use his specialful sword to bring Roy back to life. Sesshy agreed. He brought out his sword and walked over to Roy. He repeatedly stabbed him with it, bringing him to life.

Rachel glomped Roy and then Sesshomaru, and didn't feel guilty anymore. Lily then returned with a large pair of tweezers. She would have brought pain killer, but she tripped and dropped the bottle on her way to Trowa. She shrugged a wee bit guiltily, got over it, and proceeded to grab Trowa's leg. She first used the tweezers to extract the pieces of metal lodged in Trowa's leg. She then applied Hydrogen Peroxide to the resulting wounds. After that was done she forcefully shoved the bones into (miraculously) the right places. (Ow!) She then cracked the board in two and proceeded to duck tape the pieces to Trowa's leg. (To hold the bones in place so they could heal correctly.) Trowa was barely conscious. "To bad I didn't need the wrench." She said jokingly. Trowa groaned. "I hope that works, because I learned it all from TV", Lily said happily. Trowa blacked out and Lily unstrapped him from the chair.

* * *

Author's Notes: 

Poor Trowa...poor, poor, unfortunate Trowa...


	7. Chapter 7: Grapes, because I said so

**Chapter 7**

**.+ Grapes (because I said so) +.**

About a few monthes later, Trowa felt okay and Lily played Super Nintendo with him. She always won against him, though. This is due to days of practice on Lily's part. While they were doing that, Rachel was occupying Yuki, Hatsuharu, Kiba, Kamui, Kira, and Dark with a game of monopoly. Rachel, with her smartness, was the banker and everyone else were pawns in her evil, twisted game...

The reason Lily was not playing monopoly was because 1) she didn't know how, and 2) she liked Super Nintendo better. After about an hour of playing the monopoly of game, the victor was Kamui. Kamui, who had all of their 'money', had used his physic mind games to cheat and win…effectively… the other peoples left because they were sad that Kamui kicked all of their buttocks. Kamui left too because we weren't amusing him enough.

Anyway, while the Kamui was winning, the Trowa was losing to the Lily. Out of pure frustration, he whipped out his machine gun and shot that sucker multiple times. Poor game… Lily twitched, grabbed the machine gun, and hit Trowa over the head with it. (A/N: very hard, may I note). Rachel then kicked the wooden slidey-keyboard thingie into submission for being a retarded waste of wood.

Then, bored, Lily and Rachel went to the kitchen-like area (which was rebuilt by our new, undead pet Pungo Dragon of Pizza) and began to throw grapes into the air and attempt to catch them in their mouths. This was very pleasing indeed. And random. But mostly pleasing.

Then Rachel went away to clean her closet, find Chrno, and see what other hot anime guys were about… this left Lily completely alone with Trowa. This gave Lily time to ponder why she was his exact height… "You are short." She announced. Trowa then broke down in sobs, as this was his tender area. Poor thing. He grabbed his little Gundam stuffed toy and crouched into a fetal position. "…We should go to Alaska, Alaskans are shorter than we are!" (No offense to you Alaskans out there…). At hearing the word 'short', Trowa began to cry even more. "Don't worry, I'm just as _short_ as you are too!" Trowa sobbed harder. "That's it, we're going to Alaska…get yer Gundam!" Trowa walked outside with Lily to get the Gundam Dragon, tears streaming down his face. Lily patted his back, which she could easily reach.

When Rachel finally returned, there was no sight of Lily, Trowa, and/or the Gundam Dragon. Putting the pieces together, she concluded that they had gone to Alaska. (A/N: …she's good…) Rachel dragged Chrno, who she had just found cowering in the toilet, the new and much improved Roy Mustang, Sesshomaru (the vertically adept) and Kenshin, who she had just recruited. They all went to the kitchen to make smoothies…out of grapes…lots of grapes there are…yummm… grape smoothie…

* * *

Author's Notes: 

Ummm, grapes...are...good... And no offense to short people, we can't help it that you're short!


	8. Chapter 8: The Alaskan Adventure, sorta

**Chapter 8**

**.+ The Alaskan Adventure (sort of) +.**

Before we actually continue, we'd like to introduce you to the 'Gundam Dragon's new features…besides the weapons of death and mass destruction. To start off, it includes a:

-Fuzzy red interior

-CD, cassette, and record player (for the heck of it)

-Reclining squishy chairs…very comfortable

-Shiny-ness

-Dragons painted all over the inside, courtesy of Lily (I paint good)

-A sleek black body with gold trim (and by trim we mean spikes and wing-a-lings)

-A fridge stocked with glow-sticks and yummies, including chocolate, steak, and chocolate steak.

-And other junk to play around with (machine guns, etc, etc…)

On the way to Alaska, Lily asked Trowa to turn the CD player on. This would have been simple for any normal person to comply with, but Trowa couldn't be put under this category. Poor _little_ person. They immediately began fighting over which CD to play. Trowa wanted to hear something with the word 'destruction' in the title, while Lily wanted to listen to 'Good Charlotte'. They bickered over it until they realized that they went off course and were now flying toward a mountain. But not just any mountain. It was Mt. Everest! Dun-dun-dun!

"Wait, wait, wait, I forgot to turn off the virtual simulator!" Lily said as Trowa began to shriek. "We haven't even left the ground yet!" Rachel overlooked them as she searched. She hadn't been wearing her glasses (in other words, she can't see a foot away from her eyes), the naughty burger! Lily switched the virtual simulator off and told Trowa that if they could listen to the Good of Charlotte then he could pilot the Gundam Dragon.

* * *

Author's Notes:

Naughty...burger? Interesting Lily...


	9. Chapter 9: The Real Alaskan Adventure

**Chapter 9**

**.+ The Alaskan Adventure (for real) +.**

On the way to Alaska, Lily and Trowa got sort of…lost. "We're lost." Lily said. "We're not lost, we just don't know where we are." Lily rolled her eyes and continued to eat ice cream, "Riiight…" Because of Trowa's over-inflated male ego, they couldn't stop and ask for directions. (A/N: of course). But, just when Lily thought all hope was lost, she found the rest of the ice cream! (A/N: and some chocolate, too) And when all hope of finding their path was lost, a giant cat-bus from 'My Neighbor Totoro' came and told them the exact directions they needed. Then Lily said, "You better fly it, I don't know where north is…" This received a weird 'WTF' glance from Trowa and the cat-bus. "What, I don't…I can only fly into orbit or into the ground…" (A/N: Sad…but true…)

When they at last reached (and landed on) the airport, they disembarked and walked around a bit. On their way, they found a (stuffed) Grisly Bear rearing up on its hind legs and a (stuffed) fox looking at it. (A/N: This is actually in the airport of Anchorage, Alaska, for Lily has actually been there, and spent days living in a tent with her dad and the local mosquito population) Lily looked at it for a while and after announcing that she hated bears, said "Ha, ha, this bear makes us look _shorter_ than we are…" Trowa started to tear up again… It was then that they heard the crowd behind them whisper:

"_Look at those short kids…"_

"_Short…"_

"_I thought people from the continental United States were taller…"_

"_Midget…" _

"_Aren't guys supposed to be taller than girls" "Momma, that boy is vertically challenged and his hair is gravitationally improbable…"_

"_At least we Alaskans have an excuse… we're from Alaska for goodness sakes…"_

"…_ummm…short much…"_

"**SHUT THE F--- UP YOU DOGMOLESTING B----RDS, THOU WILST CLOSE THOSES--T HOLES YOU CALL MOUTHSBEFORETH ISHOVESTTHIS MACHINE OF GUN UP THINE ARSES ! YOU FILTHY POX-RIDDENWHORES WILL NOTSEETH THE LIGHT OF DAY EVER AGAIN AS I WILST RIP THINE EYES OUT OF THINE SOCKETS BEFORE I SMIGHTETH THEE!"**,sweared Lily in fancy, medievaltalk. She then smiled happily, and hugged Trowa for no apparent reason. (A/N: that was really nice censoring...)

When the crowd dispersed hurriedly, the two sho- vertically challenged ones heard clapping. They saw Rachel and company in the airport waiting for them. "What took you so long?" asked Rachel, curious…"We were directionally challenged…and Trowa's overly inflated male ego." Trowa looked away. "I don't get It, you're shorter than us, and yet we get all the comments…" Rachel then replied, "Height is only a number…" then Sesshomaru (and all of his beautiful, tall, fluffiness) towered over her.

Then, out of pure blah, Rachel said, "Is your refrigerator running, 'cause it's killing me!" Lily replied, "Does your face hurt?...Then you better go catch it!" Everyone stared at the two… much staring… Even the crowd came back and stared, but they left…because Lily looked at them… (A/N: I command absolute FEAR!)

Lily then turned to Trowa and announced, "I wuvs you".

* * *

Author's Notes:

The last sentence was completely random...but true...


	10. Chapter 10: The End

**.+ Chapter 10 +.**

**The End**

The End...maybe. For now. Go Away. Leave us alone. You people suck.


End file.
